Must Children be Disciplined?

   aymon de albatrus

5 And you have forgotten the exhortation which He speaks with you, as with sons, "My sons, do not despise the chastening of the Lord, nor faint while being corrected by Him. 6 For whom the Lord loves, He disciplines, and whips every son whom He receives." Pro 3:11,12 7 If you endure discipline, God is dealing with you as with sons; for who is the son whom a father does not discipline? 8 But if you are without discipline, of which all have become sharers, then you are bastards, and not sons. 9 Furthermore, indeed we have had fathers of our flesh as correctors, and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits, and we shall live? 10 For they truly disciplined us for a few days according to the thing seeming good to them; but He for our profit, in order for us to partake of His holiness. 11 And all discipline for the present indeed does not seem to be joyous, but grievous; but afterward it gives back peaceable fruit of righteousness to the ones having been exercised by it. (Hebrews 12:5-11)

How modern children behave?
With the advent of democracy, the feminism and the teaching of a certain Dr. Spock, it is now highly forbidden to discipline children.  In some more "modern" countries if you smack on the bottom your child you are in danger to loose your children and have them assigned to another family, more politically correct,  and you may even be put in jail.

[On the journal "Time" on December 7, 2003 this article appeared: "Kindergarten is in need of Police", some excerpts:

The youngest children behave in a most shameful, why? the female journalist asks herself, obviously a non believer,

Fits of violent tantrums are nothing new in the kindergarten and even in the first grade, but the behaviour of 6 year old girl in a school in Fort Worth, Texas has caused even the more expert personnel to run for cover.  When she was asked to put away a toy. she was playing with. she began screaming.   She was kindly asked to calm down but she threw upside down her desk and crawled under the desk of the teacher kicking it and emptying all the drawers on the ground.  Then things things really deteriorated, still screaming she got up and started throwing books and things to the other children that had to be quickly removed from the class for their safety.

Was that just a bad day at school?  NO, it was just a "normal" day.  There are many other young students that behave just like this girl. For example another that screamed to the teacher: "shut up, bitch".  Another 7 year old removed all his clothes and threw them to the school psychologist, and yet another bit the teacher so hard to leave permanent scars. 

Dr. Parker, the general psychologist of the district with 80,000 children, openly admits that this shameful and aggressive behavior between children is not secluded only to the lower social classes but it is common in middle classes as the higher ones, in other words, in all levels of society.  Packer says: "We are talking of children that answer black badly to the teachers, are incontrollable, swear profanities between themselves and to the teachers, they revolt against the teachers by biting, kicking and hitting them. We are speaking of children just over 5 year old".  A female psychologist adds that this does not concern children with psychical problems, but "normal" children.

A research made recently has concluded that the behaviour of children has seriously worsened in the last 5 years.  Noting that this bad behaviour was previously only seen in the higher grades, then it gradually degenerated downwards to the kindergartens.

The psychologists freely admit that the programs prepared for the purpose to ameliorate the situation have not resolved the situation.

The fault of this behaviour is assigned to the long time children are in front of the TV (the common denominator) and the pressure of study.  The current solution is to send the children to the psychologist and to teach teachers on how to defend themselves from the children.]

Obviously this journalist as the emeritus professors do not have a sure reason as to why these children behave like delinquents, not they have any real solutions.

But the source of the problem in in the family that, thanks to the teachings of Dr. Spock and to feminization of the family and the missing mothers at home and the world's influence, now we produce children without limitation of borders, without any discipline and without warm family love.

In the Humanist Manifesto 2 there is written: "We believe that religion (read Christianity) that puts God above the needs and the human experiences, does a disservice to the human species.  Every consideration has to pass the tests of scientific evidence. (read Evolution)

As shown the modern thought is entirely based on the centrality of man and on scientific proof.  God is excluded because He cannot be measured in the natural.  But God is a spirit and cannot be proven scientifically for science is relegated in the natural, as Scripture says:  But a natural man does not receive the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him, and he is not able to know them, because they are spiritually discerned. (1 Corinthians 2:14)

Even the state of Humanism is defined by Scripture: always learning, but never being able to come to a full knowledge of the truth. (2 Timothy 3:7)  As shown by the facts, these "educators" are facing a problem that they understand not, nor are able to solve it, for they have abandoned the Holy Religion for the hedonism of Humanism.

Here is a practical example on how our culture negatively influences the minds of children and helps them develop an attitude that all is due to them.  We have just survived the satanic activities of the 25th of December, but tell me what that demoniac chubby old men dressed in red, so much loved by the world and even in churches, produces in your children.  Aren't ALL the toys they want due to them?? Do not love the world nor the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him, (1 John 2:15)

In this season a newspaper was heavily ridiculing an healthy activity taken in South Africa:
<<"Father Christmas forbidden to the South African children"
For the children of South Africa, Father Christmas will not come -- it is now official.  The Publicity Authority has banned a commercial spot by the Post Office that would have supplied an address to the children where to send letters for Father Christmas.  

In a pronouncement issued by the Authority it was stated the the Post Office was: "taking advantage of the natural credulity of children".  "they would have operated to the conviction, in the naïf minds of the children, that by writing to that address, they would believe that they were actually writing to Father Christmas that according to tradition would have brought to them the gifts requested in the letter".

The Authority has banned the spot saying that it encourages a lie that could wound the spirit of the already disillusioned children of South Africa.  Dec 2003.>>

Someone is surely shocked by this initiative, but, in fact it is the best thing for our children. What we do with this jolly red figure is to teach our children to lie and to frantically satisfy every one of their hedonistic desires, teaching them that there is no difference between good and evil for every child receives what he wants, even those that have misbehaved during the year.

The whole thing about Father Christmas is High hypocrisy.  Throughout the year, parents punish their children for telling falsehoods. Then, at Christmas time, they themselves tell their little children this "Santa Claus" lie!

But let us look at our Text   Hebrews 12:5-11The Lord says "My sons, do not despise the chastening of the Lord,....  For whom the Lord loves, He disciplines, and whips every son whom He receives." In these evil days correction is despised as barbaric, but the Lord is of other opinion and His method does NOT change.  He says that He whips his own into justice, those whom He loves and enjoys.  Consequently those He does not correct are not His.  Indeed, He says that if we remain without correction then we are bastards and not His sons and thus foreigners to Him.  Do we want to be foreigners to God?

And for what reason He corrects us? To be partakers of His holiness and to develop in us a peaceful fruit of justice.

The fact is that us all, having inherited a sinful nature from Adam, come to this world as little vipers, little delinquents only interested in our own wretched whims.  Who has had children knows very well what I am talking about.  But the modern world does not recognize God nor admits that man is born inherently evil, that is why they are lost in their vane reasoning and so we have the society that we have.  If you do not believe me, just take the first bus and listen to the profanities in the language of the youths, even the very young.

We see that notwithstanding our fathers in the flesh were not perfect in their corrections, God approved of them anyway. But the correction of God is perfect.

1. Ensure to clearly demonstrate to your children, in words and in facts, that you love them.
   Love (Agape) is the strongest force in the Universe.  Because of Agape God created the earth, for Agape He created man and for Agape He sent His only Son to die on the cross to save His own and for Agape he calls us sons.  The same, we have had children for agape, and we must show this to them.  Love without corresponding actions is only dead love.  In the Family where love abounds between its members there are far less difficulties, if any. 

2. Ensure that your children hear you pray and that you present their names to God.
   Teach your children on how to pray.  The family that prays together stay together.  Prayer has to become a normal thing in our families, and also everywhere.

3. Ensure to teach the Bible to them.
   The knowledge of God comes from the Bible, therefore if one does not know the Bible he does not know God either.  Put some time aside to study the Bible regularly with the whole family. Encourage your children to prepare some small study using the Bible.

4. Ensure to put God first in your life and to demonstrate this in your life in generously donating money and things.  Teach them that all that one has belongs to God.
   Children are like sponges and absorb everything they see and hear, both good and bad.  Demonstrate to them that you really trust God by placing all of yours in His hands.  They will do the same.

5. Do your best to bring them to Christ early in their life.
   Children are not stupid, they know when they do wrong.  Teach them what sin is and that they are in need of a Saviour, they will readily understand the concept and will convert speedily, accordingly to God's purpose. 

6. Give them valid attention.
   The more time you give to your children, the more opportunity to lead them in the right way.  If you let the school or the TV to instruct them, surely you will soon have "devils" in your hands.  Strong bonds are developed in being together often.  If you just have to be absent, do write to them regularly.

7. Keep fair but strict discipline.
   Teach your children to say "Yes, daddy"  and "Yes, mammy".  Make sure they do not call you by your first name, as in use today, this diminishes the role of father and mother that God has given you.  No rebellion or rudeness towards the parents can be tolerated.  Do not permit your children to cry or whine too long for what was ordered to them. If the child was told twice to do something without doing it, the third time must be followed by vigorous discipline. The children must obey the first time.  If there is a true problem, you need to listen to them and give an appropriate explanation.  You must be coherent with discipline, i.e. must respond the same every time for same situation Eph 6:4.

8. Maintain strict standards on the company they keep. 1Co 15:33
   It is best that the children do not go see films and never to the disco.  Explain to them the reasons as to why, do not let them choose, you decide for them on this issue.  Your daughters must dress up modestly, not with miniskirts or tight pants (women should not be wearing pants, anyway) or low neck tops.  The children can mix with the other sex only in company of others, never one to one, if not engaged, and always during daylight. 

9. Be ready to combat the culture in which we live.
   There is need for the children to know all the things that are anti-God and anti-Bible, such as evolution.  They need to be prepared and made strong to repel the conditioning of the world.  You must ensure that no science teacher, film and worldly literature can take your children in the wrong direction.  Your home must be happy and blessed by God, and have more influence on your children that the world.

10. Ensure you live the life you preach, do not be a Hypocrite.
    Remember, the behaviour of your children is the reflection on how you live your life in front of them.

These evil days, when speaking about disciplining children, who listens generally makes a sudden jump back in horror and immediately thinks of of children beaten to blood and broken bones.   But it is not so.  By discipline it is intended the whole gamut of guidance available to the parents, from motherly warm love to physical punishment, this latter one to be the last resort.  All that is needed to grow righteous children and respectful of laws.  Physical punishment must not be excluded, but used when everything else has failed. No parent enjoys disciplining the children corporally otherwise he would not have love for his kids, but he must do it, when necessary, just because he loves his children and God commands it, as Scripture says.  Indeed, Scripture does not support Dr. Spock's views, none at all, but takes it for granted that the children need to be physically disciplined to make them grow uprightly.

1. I love my son too much to spank him:
   He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him seeks him with correction. (Proverbs 13:24)

2. My son knows by himself what is right:
   Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a boy, the rod of correction shall drive it far from him. (Proverbs 22:15)

3. There are other ways to correct the children:
   13 Do not withhold correction from a boy, for if you strike him with the rod, he will not die. 14 You shall beat him with the rod, and you shall deliver him from Sheol (Hell). (Proverbs 23:13-14)

4. I do not want to suffocate my son, nor hurt him:
   The rod and sharp words give wisdom: but a child who is not guided is a cause of shame to his mother. (Proverbs 29:15)

5. He is too young:
   Chasten your son while there is hope; let not your heart be purposing his death. (Proverbs 19:18)

6. Correction could turn him into a rebel:
   Correct your son and you will get rest, and it will give delight to your soul. (Proverbs 29:17)

7. Smacking achieves nothing:
   By the wounds of the rod evil is taken away, and strokes the inward parts of the heart. (Proverbs 20:30) 

Thus choose ye, in this day, which one would you have:
what God saith or what the world commercializes.
If a child is trained up in the right way, even when he is old he will not be turned away from it. (Proverbs 22:6)