Sex before Marriage.
aymon de albatrus
Marriage was instituted by God Himself following His decision to make the woman for the man:
Genesis 2:18 And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
The principle is that the woman was extracted from the man, for later to be reunited with the man in one flesh. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. (Genesis 2:24 AV) One flesh is achieved through sex (1Co 6:16)
God celebrated and sanctified the first marriage when He brought the woman to the man: And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. (Genesis 2:22 AV)
Can you see here reference to the regular marriage where the man awaits the woman to be brought to him by her father, her head till she passes from the headship of her father (1Co 7:38) under the headship of her husband (1Co 11:3), through marriage.
After God made the first marriage he said: And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, ÖÖÖ (Genesis 1:28 AV)
We see now the two main purposes of Marriage:
1. For man not to be alone but to have a helpmeet, and
2. To reproduce, through permitted sex, the human race.
To note that marriage was a public thing and sex was to be exercised in the context of a legitimate union with the main purpose to reproduce legalised children, not bastards, these days called "love children".
The Bible distinguishes 3 types of sex:
1. The legalised and sanctified one within a lawful marriage, approved,
2. Fornication, condemned, which is sex between unmarried people,
3. Adultery, condemned, which is sex between married people (at least one), but not to each other.
In the case of pre-marital sex, fornication, we have at least these strong condemnations:
ye know what commandments we gave you by the Lord Jesus. For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication: That every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honour; Not in the lust of concupiscence, even as the Gentiles which know not God: (1 Thessalonians 4:2-5 AV)
Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, (Galatians 5:19 AV)
but fornication, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not be once named among you, as becometh saints; (Ephesians 5:3 AV)
Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry: (Colossians 3:5 AV)
What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh. But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit. Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are Godís. (1 Corinthians 6:16-20 AV)
Can stronger statements than these be brought forward? Methinks not.
The cavilling response comes: "But we love one another and we are engaged and getting married anyway. What is wrong with that?" Well maybe you will marry, and maybe not. It will not be the first engagement that has been broken and no one can predict the future. Besides the Bible is very clear, fornication (sex between unmarried) is not permitted, whether engaged or not. Anyone arguing against such precise statements only shows the state of his heart and he is no Christian, at all, and any children born in this union are bastards.
To note the severity of being pure before marriage, a woman found un-virgin would be taken in front of her fatherís house, and Ö stoned to death.
Then they shall bring out the damsel to the door of her fatherís house, and the men of her city shall stone her with stones that she die: because she hath wrought folly in Israel, to play the whore in her fatherís house: so shalt thou put evil away from among you. (Deuteronomy 22:21 AV)
Having sternly condemned fornication (sex before marriage) the Lord gives the proper course of action for young people that burn:
Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. (1 Corinthians 7:2 AV)
And the excuse: "we have not enough money now to set up a home, so we will live together in the mean time" is no excuse at all, it is still fornication and shear unbelief with rebellion, NOT for a Christian.
Moreover if one or the other demands sex before marriage to demonstrate love, well that one is not worthy as a marital partner.
Or do you not know that unjust ones will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be led astray, neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor abusers, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor covetous ones, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor plunderers shall inherit the kingdom of God. (1 Corinthians 6:9-10 LIT)
Marriage [is] honourable in all, and the bed undefiled; but God will judge fornicators and adulterers. (Hebrews 13:4 LIT)
Clearly fornicators (sex before marriage) is a sin that excludes those practicing it from entering the Kingdom of God, that is Heaven. Meaning that fornicators are no Christians at all, if they continue in that abominable practice, no excuse.
Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. (Galatians 6:7 AV)